Santa Comes to Town!
by NIH literary editor, St.Clair Carr
[Our traditional heartwarming Christmas story has touched countless hearts; we know, because we tried counting 'em once and man, it was impossible. So we were overjoyed and overwhelmed when the author of that story, our literary editor St. Clair Carr, offered us another heartwarming tale for this Christmas. And here it is.]“Ho ho ho!” Santa cried as he stumped his way towards the chair reserved for him, an enormous sack of presents on his back. “Ho ho ho, boys and girls! Ho ho ho!”Many of the children lined up to see him cried out “Hi, Santa!”, while others were more reticent, perhaps as a result of having estimated the probability of catching a clip on the ear for not behaving themselves.
Santa dropped the massive sack at the foot of the podium on which his chair had been placed, climbed the two steps, sat down solidly, and beckoned to the young girl portraying one of his elves.
He leaned over from his chair and whispered into her ear “Thanks for the hand, eh? If you were a real elf I’d be putting a note in your personnel file. Now go and get one of those kids.”
She did as she was told, and sat the first tiny girl on the chair next to Santa’s. “Ho ho ho, little girl!” Santa boomed. “These days we can’t have the little boys and girls sitting on Santa’s lap, but perhaps your mummy would be interested.” He held out his hand to the girl’s mother, but she just laughed and said “Afraid my husband’s floating around the mall, Santa.”
”And where’s his Christmas spirit?” Santa muttered. Off to the side, between the Gap and the Source, the mall security person assigned to the Santa line spoke briefly into her walkie-talkie.
Santa dutifully asked the girl’s name, told her it was pretty, asked what she would like for Christmas, told her he’d see what his elves could put together her for her, and sent her back to her mother with a hearty wish for a merry Christmas.
Next up was a slightly older boy. Santa didn't tell him that his name was pretty, but cordially asked what he wanted for Christmas. The boy, who seemed unable to look Santa in the face, stared at the floor as he said “I’d like there to be peace in the world.”
”Ho ho ho!” Santa cried, slapping his knee. “Santa’s not with the UN, young man! Ho ho ho! Bless me, I’m in the toy game! If you want a toy, I’m your man, but if you want world peace, I can’t even get Mrs. Claus to stop nagging me! Ho ho ho!”
The security person was now looking around as if hoping to see someone she was expecting and needed to see. Santa, having coaxed the boy into requesting a plaything, dispatched him back to his mother with a hearty “Good luck with that world peace thing, young man!”
Then Santa noticed that the mall security person was pointing to him while looking down the corridor away from him. When Santa looked where she was looking, he saw a couple of husky young men in security uniforms striding purposefully toward him. He stood up.
”Here’s a notion, kids!” he shouted. “Let’s have Christmas early!”
He stepped down to his giant sack, reached inside it, and started throwing out one expensive gift after another – video games, Harry Potter books, MP3 players, cellphones, and many more. An eardrum-shattering shriek erupted from the crowd of children, and the line crumbled as it transformed itself into a screaming mob of children fighting over the presents and looting the sack, which, no matter how many presents were taken from it, still seemed as full as it had been when Santa arrived. The security guards couldn’t get past the mob, and Santa showed a sprightly turn of foot as he beat it toward the nearest exit.
He had, luckily, found a parking spot for his sleigh and reindeer near the exit. As he was taking up the reins, the little girl he had spoken to first walked by with her mother on the way to their car. Santa beckoned Mummy over. “Seriously,” he said in an undertone, “put something in hubby’s cocoa on Christmas Eve and I’ll see about delivering something special for you.”
Mummy laughed, perhaps in amused surprise, perhaps as a sign of complicity, perhaps as an attempt to facilitate her escape from a strange old man. As another man about her age walked over to join her, Santa winked and threw the reins at the reindeer, and his sleigh leapt into the air.
They heard him exclaim, as he drove out of sight, “Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night! A really good night! If you get my drift.”
Santa Comes to Town! © John FitzGerald, 2007
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