A Little Learning
an NIH special report!Four years ago NEW IMPROVED HEAD published an editorial, September 11, 2001: What We Have Learned,l in which we concluded that no one had learned anything from the atrocities of September 11. On the fifth anniversary of these atrocities, and the fourth of our editorial, we asked our experts whether anyone had yet learned anything from those horrible events. Here are their answers:
Natalie Flemme, media analyst: George W. Bush has learned that he didn’t invade Iraq to stop terrorism. He claimed at the time of the invasion that he did, but now that terrorism hasn’t stopped he’s decided the invasion was instead part of a crusade to establish democracy around the world. The next thing he’ll learn is how popular crusades are in the Middle East.
S. Cosburn Mortimer, research director of the Bankers’ Alliance for Responsible Freedom: What we have learned is how effective a managerial approach to government can be. Wisely disregarding the antiquated idea that the executive, the legislature, and the judiciary are intended to be checks on each other, George W. Bush has decided to become the chief executive officer of the United States. His initiative in arguing that the constitution of the United States gives him the power to ignore the constitution, and his gutting of new laws which attack the corporate interests of the united States by writing signing statements which ensure that they will never be enforced as they were intended, are signs of his deep commitment to the CEO model. His roll-out of powerful new marketing initiatives, such as the Iraqi WMD campaign, and the abandonment of unprofitable departments, such as New Orleans, are the hallmark of an executive dedicated to his corporate vision statement.
Roland Barphe, founder of l'Organisation Uni du Film Original québécois (l'OUFOq), editor of Excressences, and director of media studies at the Polyvalente de St-Tite: I noted three years ago that the United States administration had defined its post-9/11 role as that of leaders of a lynch mob. They have learned to like that role. Having tried to string up the Taliban and then Saddam Hussein, now they want to string up Iran. The problem is that they can’t literally lynch their victims. Saddam Hussein is still alive, for example. America’s bloodlust has not been sated, and until it is they’re going to be looking for excuses to justify stringing up some new villain.
Jason Capodimonte, modern living editor: We’ve learned that even if you can’t fool all of the people all of the time, you can fool enough of them that you can get away with pulling off some really crazy-ass shit.
Wentworth Sutton, ,assistant vice-principal, Mitchell Hepburn Collegiate Institute, Don Mills, and president emeritus, Semiologico-Hermeneutic Institute of Toronto: Three years ago I predicted that, as a result of meditating on the futility of its wanton exercises of power, “the United States will become virtuous, a model to all nations, just as it used to think it was.” I have learned that this may take longer than I thought.
Farrell Childe, licensed television critic: We have learned that while Americans are no more secure today than they were five years ago, they are more concerned with who’s going to win American Idol.
A Little Learning © John FitzGerald, 2006
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