Hang On to Your Kidneys!
by modern living editor Jason Capodimonte
June 15, 2005
Peter MacKay observed this week that Paul Martin would sell his mother's kidney if it would keep him in power. Of course, the Conservatives are only willing to sell their entire bodies and souls. While Mr. MacKay's close comrade-in-arms Stephen Harper was recently blustering about how he would too vote down the government if only somebody else would do it for him, half his caucus seems to have been negotiating with the Liberals about crossing the floor.
Many of us are no doubt thinking that we'd give up our own kidneys if in return someone would show us a party we could vote for without holding our noses. The Liberals are led by a man who claims that his leadership skills did not extend to knowing what was going on in the sponsorship program, the Conservatives are led by a man – I suppose I should specify that I mean Stephen Harper, because for a week or so the party seemed to be led by Gurmant Grewal – the Conservatives, as I was saying, are led by a man who waited to put the boot into the Liberals until after they'd stolen his boots, and the NDP is led by a man who to all appearances would make a good corporal. In fact, Jack Layton ended up as Paul Martin's corporal, didn't he?
It's no wonder so many Canadians are, to quote the legendary political reporter Artie Skermerhorn, disappointed, disgruntled, and disillusioned. But wait - there is one party which has come out of the current political circus looking like a reasonable facsimile of a political party. Why not hang on to your kidneys and vote for them?
Yes, NEW IMPROVED HEAD believes that it is time for the Bloc Québécois to run candidates in every riding in the country.
It would not be the first time that a regional separatist party had run nationally. The Reform Party had a couple of tries at it. And even today its successor, the Conservative Party of Canada, has for the chief plank of its platform the granting of sovereignty to Corporate Canada.
The current national parties would of course recoil in horror. What? – vote for separatists! Well, separatist political principles are political principles, which means the Bloc has something three national political parties we could name don't have. And really – aren't we talking about the will of the people here? Don't most Canadians – anglophone and francophone, Eastern and Western, ale-drinking and lager-drinking – don't most Canadians think the world would be a better place if Quebec were not part of Canada?
And would not Canada be better off if for once we had a decent public discussion of the advantages and disadvantages of changing the constitutional relationship between Quebec and Canada, especially as, thanks to the ardent federalists currently at the federal helm, the probability that a majority of Quebeckers will soon be voting for sovereignty is higher than ever? Wouldn't it be better if we were actually prepared for the country's falling apart?
The Canadian mainstream press consists largely of two conspiracies – a conspiracy among fuzzy-minded federalists to control the English press, and a conspiracy among clear-minded Quebec nationalists to control the Quebec press. These two conspiracies exert their control by publishing as little as possible of any news incompatible with their own points of view. In English Canada we saw a classic example of this during the campaign for the referendum on the Charlottetown Accord. Reasonable arguments against the Accord (such as the fact that many of the details had yet to be worked out) were glossed over or ignored, while harebrained ideas such as the likelihood of Canada falling apart if the Accord was not ratified were relentlessly promoted.
To be fair, the Quebec press covered this issue pretty responsibly. But they have done things like claim that English-Canadian journalists conspire with aboriginals against Quebec or misrepresent pretty well every point that Mordecai Richler ever made about separatism or write books which blame English Canada for the expulsion of the Acadians (English Canada didn't exist at the time, eh?).
The result of these two conspiracies is that Quebeckers conceive of sovereignty far differently than do other Canadians. Once again we are two solitudes, persisting in delusions simply because the other solitude has been prevented from ever challenging them.
Most English Canadians would be surprised to know that there is a serious and lively debate in Quebec about the feasibility of sovereignty. They would be surprised to know that the parti Québécois recently proposed that a sovereign Quebec should assume responsibility for 18% of Canadian government debt. Yes, they'd probably think the percentage should be higher, but then they'd be surprised to find that so do a lot of Quebeckers. They'd be surprised to find the extensive collection of materials, pro and con, about separatism and sovereignty at the Quebec website vigile.net.
So you could have a better choice than you have now. Now we are faced with trying to choose the least of three evils (or is that one evil and two pathetic imitations of evil?). We could have a fourth choice, a party which has not disgraced itself in recent months and which would force us to protect the country by actually dealing with the issue of sovereignty instead of just getting worked up about it.
So come on, Bloc Québécois, give us a chance. Run candidates across the country. Pour l'amour de Dieu.
Hang On to Your Kidneys! © John FitzGerald, 2005
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