This One Will Run and Run
by licensed television critic Farrell ChildeApril 6, 2005
As long-running costume drama Roman Catholicism neared the end of its 1,972nd season recently, fans of the spectacular show were stunned to learn of the departure from the cast of star Karol Wojtyla, who had made the role of Il Papa his for a quarter of a century.
The epic's first non-Italian star in over 400 years, Wojtyla had presented a carefully crafted characterization of an Il Papa whose public persona of a man of the people masked the heart and soul of a power-mad autocrat. Basking in the adulation of the masses by day, Wojtyla's Il Papa spent his nights plotting against those members of the masses whom his acolytes had violated, denying any responsibility to the violated, stonewalling them in lawsuits, and even going so far as to claim that the fault for his priests' and brothers' crimes lay with their corruption by the evil world that the evil masses had built for themselves – according to Wojtyla's Il Papa, the blessing of the all-powerful God that all the Il Papas have been telling us about for nearly 2,000 years is powerless against mere human beings! A stroke of true comic genius from Wojtyla, and one which the audience enthusiastically accepted.
Wojtyla's "man of the people" also enjoyed playing power politics, intervening in the eastern bloc with large subsidies to anticommunist movements while at the same time stifling liberation movements in Latin America, Africa, and the far east. In other words, Wojtyla's Il Papa could spot a winner in a second, and he made sure to ingratiate himself with the winners.
Wojtyla's interpretation of Il Papa was intended to offset the effects of Angelo Roncalli's portrayal of an earlier, ecumenically minded Il Papa, but it still did not succeed in reversing the decline in attendance at performances which has been going on for decades now. However, the strong public response to the writing out of Wojtyla from the script suggests that more frequent stagings of the death of Il Papa would be invaluable in getting bums in the seats (and money in the collection plates). Understudy Joe "Cardinal" Ratzinger's chances of taking over may be slim, then, since he is only a youthful 78.
Some other changes in the production might also help. For one thing, the costumes are getting a bit outrageous. According to the script, Roman Catholicism is supposed to be anti-homosexual, but the characters dress gayer than a Christmas tree. On the other hand, this contradiction may be intended as a sign of the futility of the overweening enterprise that is Roman Catholicism, just as other contradictions, such as the script's insistence that Roman Catholicism's God was saying 2,000 years ago that the world would end during the lifetimes of those then alive, appear to be intended.
The traditional transition script which is played whenever a new actor takes over the starring role seems a good bet to keep people interested for a month or so, but once business returns to normal it is all too likely that the decline in attendance will continue. While Roman Catholicism remains popular in the developing world, the improving economic conditions there seem likely to pose a threat to the show's popularity – if you've got enough disposable income, there are plenty of other things you can find to do that don't involve sitting around listening to the predictable and often listless performances which are about all most of the actors in the production can muster in between special events like the replacement of Il Papa.
Still, the production was so successful for so long that it can easily survive a few hundred years of poor attendance. In fact, the production could survive for centuries even if no one showed up to watch it, and it would continue to be applauded by the rich and powerful of the earth (another one of those wonderful ironies). So we can only conclude that, whatever its faults, this one will run and run.
This One Will Run and Run © John FitzGerald, 2005
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