NIH: Just Say No to Impeachment

new improved head (www.newimprovedhead.com)

Just Say No to Impeachment
an NIH special report

Some malcontents in the United States have started raising the possibility of impeaching president George W. Bush for his illegal wiretap program and the questionable "evidence" he used to justify the invasion of Iraq. Of course, right-thinking Americans are having none of this, but the White House of course is prepared for any eventuality. NEW IMPROVED HEAD has come into possession of a press release intended for publication should the issue ever be raised seriously, and we are pleased to be able to share it now with YOU, our loyal readers:
Top 10 Reasons Not to Impeach George W. Bush
10. President's impeachment suit lost at dry cleaner's.
  9. Pat Robertson threatening to assassinate any representative who votes for articles of impeachment.
  8. The removal of president Bush would result in the U. S. losing its proud status as the nation with the world's largest deficit.
  7. The president is too busy organizing the response to Hurricane Katrina.
  6. The president's illegal wiretaps reveal that impeachment would fail, anyway.
  5. Impeachment only allowed in years containing an R.
  4. Would keep the president from finishing his National Guard stint.
  3. Would lower property values on Pennsylvania Avenue.
  2. Look who's next in line, eh?

And the number one reason not to impeach George W. Bush:
  1. The Constitution hasn't bothered the administration so far, why start bothering it now?

Just Say No to Impeachment © John FitzGerald, 2006
Home